Protect Me From Harm
by goldenspringtime
Summary: He could see his cage, but it mattered little to him since he was in a far worse but invisible one.


**Disclaimer: I don't own Thor**.

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><p>He could see his cage, but it mattered little to him since he was in a far worse but invisible one.<p>

"Please go away." Loki pleaded. Not for the first time regretting the impulsive decision he had made long ago.

"My duty is to protect you. How can I protect you if I go away?" The familiar voice answered. He supposed that others could find his situation hilarious. In that he had always accused others of being fools, but had turned out to be the biggest fool himself.

"I no longer desire your protection." Loki said. Again, not for the first time. Part of him wondered what it was he was hoping to achieve, since they had had this conversation many times but nothing had ever come of it.

"It is my duty to protect you. It is what you made me for." Loki curled up into a corner of his mind. He could see his cage. Could see whatever happened, but it made little difference to him. Loki was still in a cage whether or not he was actually physically in one.

"Yes from bullies. Not to take over my entire life." he whispered into the wall.

"I have to protect you." Loki closed his eyes or at least whatever he was now did.

"How can you be protecting me when The Chitauri want me dead and Asgard has me prisoner because of your actions." he asked bitterly, even though he already knew the answer he would get.

"I knew that you couldn't be trusted to protect yourself when you threw yourself off the Bitfrost. I knew that I had to eliminate all threats to you."

"Thor wasn't a threat and you tried to kill him anyways." Loki said bitterly.

"He would have gotten in the way of your plan." He had screwed up so badly. The spell was single minded about his goal to "protect" Loki it couldn't see beyond it. Couldn't see reason. It's only goal was to protect Loki by whatever means necessary.

He had made him, Loki reminded himself. Loki made the monster that was the only thing that anyone saw anymore. It wasn't supposed to be like this though. It was supposed to be a simple protection spell. It wasn't supposed to give him another personality whose one and only concern was his safety: both physical and emotional.

He shouldn't have done the spell the first place. The first thing his mother had taught him about magic was not to not do a spell that he wasn't ready for, or that he didn't understand and he had done it anyways just because of a few insults. He had made himself a monster simply because of a few insults.

"You are safe now in here, at least until I can get out." Loki winced because he knew what his other personality intended to do when it got out.

"I don't need your protect anymore, I fine." Loki insisted hoping against hope that it would finally work this time.

"The only way you'll be safe is when all the threats are removed." Loki hated hearing that because he knew what the voice meant.

"Please leave them alone." Yes he was mad at his family. Mad that his father had lied to him. Mad that Thor had always gotten all the attention and had left him in the shadows, but he didn't want either of them dead. Not like the other part of him did.

"All they have ever done is hurt you." the other side replied.

"Please just let me have control." He pleaded. He hadn't been in control of his body or his actions for more than a few moments at a time ever since falling from the Bitfrost in defeat. Before he had fallen it had mostly been him, with his other side stepping in a couple of times to defend Loki with sharp words or with tricks. However over the years the spell, or maybe the way he had cast it seemed to have degraded a bit. Slowly over time his other side had lost reason and judgment until it had become single minded about his goal to protect Loki.

"You can have control as soon as I eliminate all those who cause you harm and give you want you want the crown."

"I don't want to be king anymore!" Loki yelled. It had captured his childish desire to be king and seemed determined to make him so again. Yes, he had spent years desiring to be king. But spending so much time locked inside his own head, unable to control himself, because of a stupid spell he had cast on himself had changed his view. He had been selfish and petty as much as Thor, but in a different way. He wished that he could take it back. He wished that he could make everything right, but he didn't know how. He had created the monster inside of him and he didn't how to make it stop. He had tried reasoning with the monster, but he wouldn't listen. Loki had tried deceiving him, but that didn't really work either since they shared a mind.

"You will have control again, as soon I eliminate all those who would cause you harm and give you what you want, the crown." Loki hated this. He hated being trapped in his own mind watching as the people around him hated and scorned him. None one seemed to notice that he was twice a prisoner.

He wanted control of his body again. To be free of the one who sought to "Protect" him. The one who had given instruction to the monster that killed his mother. Hearing the news had allowed him to momentarily overpower the other side, but it had only been for a moment. No he couldn't think about that now. He hated crying in here because it wasn't real, and it didn't make him feel any better about it.

"After all this time, now you come to visit me brother. Why?" Loki looked up and saw Thor. No. Thor was supposed to stay away from him. Loki wasn't safe, he couldn't be trusted. He didn't hear what Thor and his body were talking about as he plead inwardly.

"Don't touch him." Another thing that had changed. He had spent so much of his life being jealous of him, it wasn't until his other self had tried to kill Thor that he realized exactly how much he loved his brother. Regardless of the fact that they weren't actually brothers.

"His time will come but Thor has some time still. Odin is the one that hurt you most. As such he is first. Then the rest of the Chitauri and Thanos. Then Thor, Sif and the Warriors three."

"Please leave me." Loki begged even as his body created an illusion of him being disheveled in response to Thor. When in reality the one in control felt nothing at the death of his mother. In fact if it hadn't ended up the way it had the one in control probably would have engineered it.

"You created me to protect you and I will do what I was made to do." he said as his voice outwardly said.

"When do we start?"

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><p>6<em>00 years ago.<em>

_Loki grabbed his books in his arms even though they were soaking wet. Some of his classmates had thought it would be fun to play keep away with his books. Only one of them had missed catching them and they had ended up in a puddle that had came from the rainy weather they had been having lately. He made his way into the library and tried to use his magic to negate the damage done by the puddle, but it was ineffective._

_Loki put his head on his arms and faced the desk in front of him angry and ashamed. If only he had been stronger. If it had been Thor...well Thor wouldn't have tried to protect books, but if for some reason Thor had gotten a brain upgrade and felt the inclination to protect books he would have knocked all their fellow students out before allowing them access. Why was he weaker than Thor? Was he destined to always be weaker than Thor? Constantly picked on and berated? It couldn't be. Loki was Asgardian and could live to be 5000. It seemed unbearable of the thought of being berated for his magical inclinations for the rest of his long life. Loki stood up from his books and made his way to the section that had books about magic. After thumbing through a few books he had finally found the spell._

_Skepia meg sterk_

_Sterk nok for å overleve_

_Beskytt meg fra skade_

_Loki paused, he knew that he wasn't supposed to cast spells of this level. It was a master level spell and he wasn't there yet. Still he was tried of being pushed around all the time. Being hurt because it felt like no one was on his side. The spell would be make him stronger and more resilient it had to be worth the risk. Besides he knew what he was doing right?_

_Beskytt meg fra skade (Protect me from harm)_

_Wrong._

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><p><strong>AN: I don't speak Norwegian and all translations are done via online translators so I apologize if they are totally off. **

**A/N: I'm not sure what's up with me I have several stories about Loki's motivations and some of them with outsides forces effecting him in mysterious ways. They also have varying amounts of culpability. So if you like these kind of stories I have some more. The stories are called Buried Memories, Darkness Bleeds, Good Intentions, Doozie, His desire, Sometimes Father Does Know Best, Smarter than the Average Chitauri, and Take it. They're all one or two shots except for Good Intentions. **


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